I Think I'm Falling In Love RemusSirius Drabbles
by darkwoodsdreamer
Summary: A set of 100 drabbles depicting the romance of Remus and Sirius. Rated T just in case.
1. Beauty

******This is going to be exactly 100 chapters, each a Drabble that tells part of the story of Remus and Sirius's romance, because we all know that no matter how hard JKR tried to hide it, it did happen. It is being written for the 100 prompts, 100 drabbles, 100 words or less competition by Dancingwithrainbows. **

**The first prompt was beauty.**

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><p>He only ever sees his scars, the lines that crisscross over his body, and nothing else. I look underneath and find laughter and joy and softness and shy love and just everything that makes him so damn beautiful. So why can't he look past the outside... And see himself the way I see him? In all his glory, standing proud and strong.<p>

Remus, I love you.


	2. Love

**I think I'm just gonna make the prompts the chapter names from now on so look there. I'll change chap 1's title so it's the same.**

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><p>Love.<p>

It's a funny word. It's filled with hopes and desires and fulfilled promises. It speaks of happiness and desire and passion. It promises the world and lets you jump high enough to touch the clouds.

But it never tells you about the pain you go through when you can't tell the person you love the most.

Sirius, I love you.


	3. Dream

**I have no idea what to say. I'm so tired right now. Uh... Review. And enjoy. Man, reading that again, I sound like I'm on drugs lol. Let's try that again.**

**Hi! I'm really tired right now... Well I have nothing else to say, so review and enjoy! :)**

**Thats better.**

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><p>I'm holding his hand, finally holding his hand. He's looking at me with those eyes, the ones filled with happiness and I know he feels like I do. I reach out to caress his cheek and suddenly he's gone. I bolt up in bed and he's still in his own, sleeping soundly.<p>

Remus, I love you so much it hurts.


	4. Haunted

**This one sorta sounds like a poem. :)**

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><p>I want to be with him; I want to stay away. I long to spend every second by his side; but instead I move away. I'm so terrified that he'll figure out how I feel; but what if he feels the same? I'm constantly looking over my shoulder; I'm sick of playing this game.<p>

Sirius, I love you so much it hurts.


	5. Memory

**Listen to Her Diamonds by Rob somethingorother. Just put her diamonds into YouTube and it should come up. It's been stuck in my head all day.**

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><p>Do you remember when we first found out that you were a werewolf? You tried so hard to fight it, tried to keep us from finding out. You wouldn't meet our eyes and you kept a distance always.<p>

And now you do the same again. So what are you hiding this time?

I will figure you out, Remus Lupin.


	6. Fragile

**Hey.**

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><p>He acts so tough. He always has a smile, always blows off whatever insults he's dealt by the Slytherins, always has a fresh idea for an amusing prank.<p>

But then you turn around and find him staring off into space, an uncharacteristic thoughtful look on his face or see him pale at the train station when his parents come to pick him up.

Is he fragile and child-like or a hardened prankster?

I will figure you out, Sirius Black.


	7. Celebration

**I'm running out of things to say here...**

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><p>He knows. Holy shit, he knows. I knew I should have never let James rope me into going to that party. I should have known I would have gotten drunk and told him how I felt. I'll just stay here locked in this broom cupboard and hope that he just decides it must have been the alcohol.<p>

Please don't hate me, Rem.


	8. Secret

**Um... Marilyn Manson.**

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><p>What... was that about? Does he know? Was he making fun of me? Oh shit, please please please let him not know. Maybe he was just drunk and ran off when he realized what he had said, thinking I would think he meant it. But Sirius has had girlfriends, he can't love me. Was he really just teasing me...?<p>

Please don't hate me, Pads.


	9. Promise

**Pearl Jam. Yup.**

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><p>How many times do I have to tell him before he understands that I will never leave his side? I will always be here until the very end, no matter what happens. I will stick with him until he tells me to leave... because I love him. And damn, I wish I could really tell him.<p>

I promise to stay with you forever, Remus Lupin.


	10. Innocence

**How about... Skillet. Yeah, I'm currently very obsessed with Skillet.**

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><p>I don't think he gets it. I'm a werewolf; there is going to be times when he can't stay by my side and protect me. He doesn't understand that the wolf will rip him to shreds if he's not careful. He's too carefree, he doesn't bother to make sure it's safe before jumping in headfirst. He's too innocent.<p>

But I can't push him away, no matter how much I know I should. I'm weak.

I promise to always stay with you forever, Sirius Black.


	11. Moonlight

**Hello! I will try to have 10 chapters up today. :)**

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><p>The moon. I know he hates it, but he doesn't seem to mind sitting here with me, outside under the sky. As the moonlight illuminates us, I see how beautiful he is and can't help it - I tell him that I love him and ask him to go out with me. He doesn't respond for a moment, but whispers that yes, of course he will a few seconds later. I kiss him and all is right in the world.<p>

I'm the happiest person in the world, thanks to you, Remus.


	12. Whisper

**Bonito. Todo me parece bonito. :) (to any Spanish speakers, did I spell parece correctly...?)**

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><p>As we sit under the clear night sky, illuminated by the object I have come to both love and hate, it finally happens. With a blush that could rival the reddest apple, he tells me that he likes me - no, he loves me. He asks me if I'll be his boyfriend. I'm so happy I almost forget to answer. I eventually am able to say yes in a hush, my voice so low I wondered if he heard me. And then he kissed me, and my world was complete.<p>

I'm the happiest person in the world, thanks to you, Sirius.


	13. Echo

**In case you people are curious, that quote was from Bonito by Jarabe de Palo. There, that's your one new thing to learn today. Your welcome. **

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><p>The wolf howls as the Marauders race down the tunnel, probably able to smell us. I glimpse the wolf and change into Padfoot, the others following suit. As soon as Moony sees us, his whole demeanor changes from destructive to playful. We spend the night wrestling and laughing, each of us doing our best to distract the wolf.<p>

But as the sun rises, fresh screams emit from our best friend and echo off the walls. This is our cue to sneak away.

He doesn't deserve this pain.


	14. Jealousy

**Yeah, you know. Stuff. Lots and lots of stuff.**

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><p>I can't help it. I see him winking and flirting with girls and I feel hatred rising in my chest and have to work not to glare daggers at the girls. I know we agreed that this was how it had to be so no one found out but I still feel that way. We had a fight about it and afterwards I think he felt bad about it and now so do I.<p>

He doesn't deserve this pain.


	15. Passion

**So yeah. Watching Angelbeats, you guys should too. It's actually pretty good a bit farther in, even if the beginning is a bit stupid.**

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><p>Hands roam and lips meet in the dark. We never go further in case Pete and James come in the dormitory. There's always a silencing charm on the room, but even so we remain as quiet as possible. James comes long before usual to turn in early. We pull apart just as he walks in, hiding behind the hangings of our individual beds. The silencing charm makes him suspicious.<p>

How much longer can this go on?


	16. Lies

**Tokatta ne, to? (Wasn't it great?) Just... Stuff.**

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><p>I don't like this. First it was Sirius flirting - he had to lie to all those girls. And now we pull apart as James walks into the room, pretending like nothing ever happened. Lies, all lies. My life is one large falsehood and I hate it. But if I change it, will I lose Sirius? I couldn't live without him, not now that I know what it's like to have him.<p>

How much longer can this go on?


	17. Regrets

**Next chappie, folks!**

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><p>This is bad. I got the feeling that James was on to us, but he never said anything. I couldn't figure out why he didn't call us out. Now I know. He wanted us to tell him himself. And now he's upset. It was so stupid to keep it from the Marauders. Why didn't we trust them?<p>

Marauders until the end, right?


	18. Trust

**NO THIS ANIME IS SO SAD. *sob* Anywho, enjoy this chapter.**

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><p>I always hated those conversations, the ones where you end up having to explain yourself and your actions, apply logic to situations where there was no logic in your actions. We talked, confessed, and I think Pete even cried a bit. We came to a middle ground; they tried to accept us and we tried to accept that this was hard for them.<p>

Marauders until the end, right?


	19. Revenge

**So for those who have seen Angelbeats, am I the only one who assumes there has to be a second season...? Is there a second season you know of?**

**Oh and sorry it's been so long. Been pretty busy but I finally finished this. Chapter 19 peeps! Review onegai shimasu! ^_^**

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><p>Curses pass in flashes of colored light as Snape attacks James out of nowhere. This isn't a rare occurrence but there seems to be extra venom behind Snape's spell work today. I think James has pushed him too far and this is his revenge. Sirius pulls me down as a stray curse flies my way and immediately pulls away from me, remembering where we are.<p>

I wish it didn't have to be this way.


	20. Beach

**Sorry it's taken me so long to update, but this prompt was hard to fit in with the way my story has been going and the setting and everything, but I eventually managed it. I'll try to get a few more up tonight but no promises. Enjoy and don't forget to review!**

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><p>It's all depends on my acting skills. Pretend like I like girls, pretend like I love my 'girlfriend', pretend to enjoy the magazines James nicks with the just barely dressed girls lounging on the beach, pretend I don't notice the way Remus looks at them with disgust, pretend pretend pretend. We decided, though, we agreed that it had to be this way. But still, I hate knowing I'm causing him more pain.<p>

I wish it didn't have to be this way.


	21. Midnight

**I'm particularly proud of this one, so like it. Please.**

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><p>It's midnight and the full moon has risen. I writhe and scream as again and again my bones melt and reconstruct themselves as painfully as they can possibly manage. My muscles are on fire and my blood boils hot. The wolf howls and slams against the confines of my mind, trying to escape while I try futilely to hold it back.<p>

But the pain ends at a terrible cost - my mind.


	22. Confessions

**Next chapter! Enjoy and review!**

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><p>Winter brings the thing I hate most - Christmas vacation. I must go home, pretend to be the good obedient conforming pureblood son by day and be beat senseless for no apparent reason by night. My father uses the Cruacious Curse on me to punish me for being a Gryfinndor, for being gay. I told him to make me disown me - but it only made things worse. Finally he lifts the curse and I can breathe again.<p>

But the pain ends at a terrible cost - my mind.


	23. Crush

**Sad chapter, and I think I'll be using this spike for a few chapters. :)**

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><p>I know something's wrong. Ever since he got back he hasn't been able to think straight, he always looks and sounds drunk, he skips class almost every day now. He's not the same. I don't know where he gets the alcohol so I can't stop him, but I wish I could. It's crushing me inside.<p>

Somebody please, help him.


	24. Chocolate

**Sorry it's been so long but I finally have the next chapter!**

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><p>I'm drunk. Again. I know he hate it when I get like this and try to soften him up with chocolate, his favorite. I know it's not helping, and I know he's worried and I can't do anything to help him; all I do is hurt him.<p>

Somebody please, help him.


	25. Alone

**Another chapter. :)**

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><p>I feel alone.<p>

I've trapped myself in this little bubble of alcohol and depression and I can't penetrate it. Remus has all but given up on getting through to me. He simply sits by me, but even that is more comfort and kindness than I deserve for what I'm doing to him.

This needs to stop.


	26. Rain

**Another chapter. :) Hey, you people should watch the Maracuders videos made by jenxthejinx on YouTube. They're funny.**

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><p>I stand outside in the driving storm, wondering why I can't help him, why he's so far away now. Is it my fault, or is it the alcohol? Or is it both? Whatever it is, it can't be like this. I march into the castle, intent on doing something this time. I've decided.<p>

This needs to stop.


	27. Letters

**Have you looked up those videos yet? No? Well, get on it! Right after you read this chapter and review, of course**

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><p>Mother has written me. She has sent me yet another letter telling me what a failure I am, a disappointment, unworthy of the Moste Noble and Ancient House of Black. She tells me how she doesn't love me. I wonder, if that's true, why doesn't she just stop writing? I take another swig of whiskey.<p>

And I'm caught.


	28. Cold

**So the whole thing behind this was that Remus was caught having emotions, whereas Sirius was caught with alcohol. It was the only way I could get it to work, lol. Just thought I'd explain in case there was any confusion. **

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><p>He promised me.<p>

He told me he would stop drinking and I walk in on him drinking whiskey! I should be angry. I should feel cold and disgusted. But I can't. All I can do is cry. I try to keep how I feel hidden from him, so that he won't know I'm as weak as I really am. I need to be strong - for him.

And I'm caught.


	29. Dark

**Another chapter for all you wonderful yaoi lovers out there. I promise more chapters in exchange for reviews and coffee.**

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><p>I wish that the dark could mask his tears or the stifling silence hide his suppressed sobs, but I hear it all. I have been hurting him all along, and I knew it, yet I still did it. He falls to the floor and hides his face. I drop the bottle and it smashes, sending the liquid spilling over onto the carpet, but I don't care. I just hold Remus to me and whisper words of comfort, whisper promises, and wonder if I can really keep them this time.<p> 


	30. Addiction

**Next chapter! Hey, I'm about to make a new account to post stories for random Katekyo Hitman Reborn couplings. If you know the show, look up ATrollingWeWillGo. I don't know if there will be anything up today, but there will be soon! **

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><p>Addiction.<p>

It's a powerful thing. Sirius has dark circles under his eyes and always seems tired and out of it. Of course it's the withdrawal symptoms - I keep telling him to visit Madam Pomfrey, but he won't do it. He's too stubborn, he thinks he has to do it all himself. That it's only his problem. I want to help him, to be there for him.

But will he let me?


	31. Flower

**Hi.**

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><p>I sit outside, by the lake, holding a bright blue flower. Remus is only a few feet away from me, discussing something with James and Peter in whispered voices, probably about me, judging by the way they glance at me every few seconds. I look back at my flower. Remus doesn't understand. I need to do this by myself. If I don't conquer my problem on my own, have I really gotten over it?<p>

But will he let me?


	32. Snow

**Another chapter. I'm cranking these out in like 10 seconds after no sleep. I hope they're not that bad...**

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><p>The seasons are changing, and fairly quickly. What used to be a warm early fall is quickly turning to the bitter cold winters I know so well and hate. Snow will fall soon. By the time the snow has fallen, I won't drink anymore. By the time the snow has fallen, I will be able to stare Ogden's best right in the face and not feel any temptation. By the time the snow has fallen.<p>

I hope it comes soon.


	33. Temptation

**I think this chapter closes the whole alcoholism spike, though we may revisit this for lack of inspiration. Warning: I think this whole think is really just going to be super depressing. Lol.**

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><p>I think he sneaks the alcohol sometimes, when it just gets too hard, but I try to overlook this. We're moving on. We've passed this hurdle, and we can get back to us. Me and him. The way it should be. The way it was. He's trying, I know he is, and he's doing it because I was so worried. It's for me. I shouldn't ask for more, but I do. I ask that Sirius be strong, stronger than I am, someday.<p>

I hope it comes soon.


	34. Autumn

**A new plot spike! Still Sirius, of course. Hopefully we'll get to Remus. This one shouldn't last too long, depending on what prompts I have next.**

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><p>Autumn is gone, and with it goes the cool but not cold crisp air, the beautiful colored leaves that paint the grounds, and spending time just looking out over the lake. At the same time, winter ushers in a time of destruction, of cold wet snow, and of Christmas vacation. It means going home for the first time since Remus and I became a real couple; will I betray us? Can I keep our secret safe?<p>

Can I be trusted?


	35. Unity

**Okay, two plot spikes at the same time! Let's see how horribly this fails, shall we?**

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><p>James and Pete, it occurs to me, don't really know about us. Sirius and I. We've implied it, made it obvious, but do they really know? I think they both do; they just pretend they don't. Are they waiting for us to say something, or just don't want to believe it? Does Sirius want them to know? Do I want them to? Every time I see them, I get the urge to say something, but I know I can't. Not yet, at least.<p>

Can I be trusted?


	36. Rogue

**Yep. Nothing to say this time.**

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><p>Christmas vacation is here, so I am going home, if you can call it that. No, the Potter's is my home. Grimmauld Place is nothing but the house I live in. I am the white sheep of the Black family; everyone knows it, and no one cares for me or about me. So why do they insist I come? They don't want me around, I don't want to be around, so why can't I just stay away?<p>

I hate this.


	37. Champagne

**I realize I lied last chapter; I did have something to say, just nothing of importance.**

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><p>I'm going home, back to the parents who wish I was never born. If I hadn't been born, I wouldn't have been bitten. And if I hadn't been bitten, I wouldn't have caused them so much trouble. I feel like my very existence is forbidden when I'm in this house. They laugh and drink champagne, enjoying Christmas; all I want to do is leave, all I can think about is the new secret that replaced the old, the one I now don't dare tell even the Marauders.<p>

I hate this.


End file.
